Category Archives: Thoughts

Looming Velocipede Know as Sister-yphus

woman-in-mirror

Full of doubt

Sitting,

Waiting with out.

The tears comfort themselves now

Because I’m always such a fool

For how words form

In that beautiful mouth.

I’m sodden now with

All the things you can’t with.

Even showers neglect to clean me

Before dusk falls on my thoughts.

My heart sings believe

My smart mind knows better

No matter how much your touch

Brings life back to my shatteredness.

Why,

Why rolling heavy losses up mountain tops,

As I wait for years of time to finally catch up.

Even I was unaware the torture

Would eventually turn on itself.

Nothing left of this field of sweet

smells, black top, and hopeless tires rolling as intended wanting to miss

the boulder set to meet me at sunset with only a man running the

opposite direction instead of

towards the helplessly lost.

Brace for impact.

Or not.

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Trying to remember it.

A funeral but for the things I have to tell myself sometimes to just breathe.

A eulogy for all the things turreted towards me I thought I could help, or fix, or get back on track but never did.

A pyre lit for all the potential I see in people that they never discovered of themselves burning with the oil made of the pain that has resulted because of this.

What do people do after this?

Lost broken hope,

Every bit deep enough inside themselves just hoping one day it’s a Pandora’s box with someone else opening it thousands of years away unleashing it’s empathy back into light.

If I had hope currently, I’d believe that but it must have gone in with the rest while I wasn’t paying attention. 

So I’ll just wait here. Because I’m tired of kind of always just holding it up anyway. I probably deserve a break. 

Fragment 11.983

Forgive me, this is now months old. I felt cleaning drafts was due before years end. Interesting topic, as I, myself date older men. But there’s a line somewhere in 2016, no? Here’s to thinking one grew out of his teens just because the years passed and someone that would never ❤

Start tyrate after a 6 hour drive and too much time to think with my beautiful daughter next to me:

What sort of man incites such malice with in a kind heart like mine? One that thinks it’s funny to hit on my 15 year old daughter. One, that expects me to buy him unending beers. One, that leaves me in front of a busy hotel to meet a gaggle of men asking me why I’m an irish girl in part of town I don’t belong in, alone outside. The sort, that sits in a car silently, phone in hand, as I stave off a 6’3′ man accosting me in a parking lot I also didn’t belong in that all the while pretends he loves me.  But mostly, a 40 yo man wanting a child. I will always protect before I partake in anything selfish. If two 15 year olds had children, You’re practically old enough to be her grandfather.  Get it now?

So, enjoy the reality. The true one, not  some I’m  misunderstood delusion. I wonder if there is a public list for this man’s kind. Stop coming here as well. You are also not welcome to steal my writing for your own inspiration either.

In the meantime, perhaps a decent girl proving her point can be finished with a disappointment beyond imagination. Thanks for the momentary loss of faith in humanity. Good thing, I know how to make it, share it, give it, instead of take it.

Xoxo

 

 

 

Fragment 9.788

My hand held the brush expertly,

Coloring the sun,

On everything passed,

As I gently inhale life-

Back into my lungs

Between each flowing stroke.

Attentive to every corner

In need of covering,

Loving,

Refurbishing.

Plucking last seasons wings,

Before tonight’s

Contented sleep

For the 6th week in a row

After so many years

Of insomnia’s bothersome goblin fiend.

xoxo

 

Past: Oasis

oasis_by_lashellevalentine-d9dzitt*This was marked August 15, 2015. I suppose I wrote a plea just before the end and let it sit on the shelf unattended. I am never sure what to do with such things because by the time I think this way, I’ve already set myself free.

Oh, timing you’re an odd item, aren’t you?

 

Make my wild heart sing,

And not just with your fervent passion

Just before we sleep

But in the morning with your guitar,

Coffee, omelets, and succulent melodies.

Before we travel the world to help change things

Help the tired sleep,

Give of ourselves to others

Because we both love

Comfort,

Compassion,

And contagious happy memories.

Holding the door longer than others

To help keep them from the rain

Making them smile

With the entirety of our own being.

The being of us,

Our love,

And how beautiful

Together just about everything can be.

Help me, help us remember living

Before the world tried to destroy joy,

Only to replace it with hostility.

Let’s find tenderness again,

Even in the most mundane things.

Discover again,

The balance of the the lush oasis

Long before the desert was the only

Part of humanity left to see.

Words: M(e.)

Undelivered Meeting Place: LashelleValentine

The Hidden Ever-present Carry On: First Aid Kit- Silver Lining

 

 

 

Well… I don’t even know as well.

I attempted my first spoken word almost slam piece. It’s always weird to hear yourself recorded isn’t it? Even weirder with an altered attempt to use the words to evoke. I’m not sure it’s something I’ll continue since it’s so foreign because I miss my voice’s fluidity when listening to it he he

But here for those that do not follow me at the other place if you’d like to hear.

Fragment 4.0513

Recharging, releasing, expelling, and unfolding in the ecstasy of this simplicity before I am suffocated by the constrains of systematic bureaucracy once again. There is never enough time between. Never enough aesthetic beauty to fill the void my freedom seeks from what the thinkers, think I should be. But I’m closer everyday to answering the calling my soul seeks.